Smelly Daniel and the Long Hike Home
“These smells just keep getting better and better. It’s in my ears, and ewww, in my mouth—”
“Daniel, give it a rest! You were knee deep in the muck like the rest of us.”
“Till I went completely under, Jack.”
“Because you lunged away from a branch and lost your footing, Daniel.”
“Because you told me it was a snake, Jack!”
“Daniel.” Jack sniffed. So putrid… gonna heave. “I can smell you again. Stop and let us get upwind again.” Jack and Sam hurried their pace. Jack shot back over his shoulder at the quickly receding form, “Teal’c's got your six.”
Daniel looked behind him, scouting the area. “Where is he?”
“He’s back there. Over there.”
Daniel squinted. “That small shadow on the hill?”
“Since he had to be behind you… he wanted to be as far as possible, yet near enough to protect you.”
“Oh, ha ha. Not even remotely funny.”
Think about the shower. “I can’t wait to get this off me.” He’d changed clothes earlier; it hadn’t helped.
A twinge in Daniel’s arm reminded him why it was there and he was off again. “My arm still hurts from what I bumped into under that muck. ‘Not letting you forget this is your fault… not ’til I’m clean again! And don’t you dare get in my way! I’m first in the shower. You didn’t get this muck on your skin. Uck! I can taste the stuff… you thought it just smelled like shi—”
“Uh, Daniel, Janet’s been informed and—” Sam interrupted but then stopped when the Colonel nudged her.
“Ix-nay, Carter,” Jack said barely audibly.
“But Sir, Daniel should be told—” Carter entreated softly.
“Carter, do not tell him. He’s bad enough now. Imagine if he knew what awaits him when we get to the gate?”
“He’d be throwing fits.” Sam answered understanding the Colonel’s point of view. “Probably spouting multi-lingual language fouler than that muck on him.”
“Exactly. All the way back. Then at the SGC, during quarantine.”
“But Sir… he finds out you knew and didn’t tell him…”
“He’ll find out anyway. At least this way we’ll have three hours of relative calm before the proverbial Daniel-storm hits.”
Sam looked back at Daniel, who’d started another rant. Sadly shaking her head, she increased her pace to catch up with the Colonel. “You’re probably right, Sir.”
Sorry, Daniel, but I think the Colonel’s right, I’d hate to think what you’d do if we told you Janet planned to keep you in a containment suit in the quarantine to run tests on the muck and the wound you got while submerged in it until she gives you the all clear. And that the suit’s waiting by the gate for you. Yep, so not a good thing to tell you.
“… its even in my… well I don’t want to talk about THOSE areas.”
“Good, no talking would be good, why don’t you dwell on that for a while.”
Daniel glared at the back of Jack’s head. “‘Should’a pulled you in with me Jack, so you’d how bad this is. ‘Should be back here walking next to me, Jack…”
Jack sighed.
The End
