Sweet Tooth
Author’s Note: For The Ancient Obsessions Advent Challenge – December 14 (Candy Cane)
A weak light illuminated the forms of Jack O’Neill and Daniel Jackson in one corner of Samantha Carter’s research lab.
A barely intelligible murmur came from Jack.
As the ‘words’ left the Colonel’s mouth, Daniel sighed and immediately translated the sounds in his mind.
“Well,” groused Daniel, “I might be able to ‘hurry up’ if you’d hold still!”
Jack squirmed a little and let loose another non-coherent babble in response.
Daniel didn’t even bother to try to understand Jack this time. He was too close to achieving his goal. Daniel’s face screwed up in concentration and he bit the tip of his tongue as he mumbled to himself.
“Still don’t know how you managed to do this. Hold on-almost got it! Maybe if I use these pliers…”
Jack’s eyes widened at the word ‘pliers’ and he settled down instantly. The idea of Daniel using pliers anywhere in the vicinity of his mouth was truly terrifying, and since Daniel’s entire being was focused on the roof of Jack’s open mouth, he figured shutting up was his best bet at getting out of his predicament with all his teeth intact.
Daniel reached behind him to Sam’s workbench without taking his eyes off Jack’s mouth. His fumbling hand soon grasped the pliers in question and returned to his task.
Daniel took a deep breath. “You ready?”
Jack’s eyes met Daniel’s ever so briefly. Jack nodded, taking a deep breath of his own.
Daniel swallowed. “Ok, then. Hold on.”
Jack did as he was told. His fingers dug into the sides of his chair and he clamped his eyes shut.
After several seconds that seemed like an eternity, in which Jack was acutely aware of Daniel’s fingers and those damned pliers knocking around in his mouth, Jack felt a sudden tug in the roof of his mouth. It was oddly painless, but Jack knew that Daniel’s operation was successful by the whoop of joy that echoed around the lab.
“Yes! Got it!”
Jack’s tongue explored his mouth and he smiled. “Thank God.”
Daniel couldn’t help but laugh at the extreme relief on Jack’s face as he stared at the source of all this trouble. A two inch long perfectly straight section of a candy cane was protruding from the jaws of Sam’s pliers.
Jack lanced Daniel with a glare. “It’s not funny.”
Daniel’s eyebrows rose to record heights. “Oh, yes, it is, Jack.”
Jack reluctantly had to agree. “Okay, so it’s a little funny.”
“It’s a lot funny, Jack. I mean, how does the leader of SG-1, taunter of the Goa’uld and brave warrior, get taken down by a candy cane?”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah… they should put warnings on those things.”
“Like what? Don’t let Colonels eat small segments or they may become lodged between the teeth in the roof of the mouth? Come on! You couldn’t do that twice if you tried! And at the Christmas party to boot!” Daniel burst out laughing, unable to contain himself any longer.
Jack pouted. “Yeah, well…”
Daniel continued to laugh. “You could’ve just let it melt, you know.”
Jack rolled his eyes. “And drool all over myself until it did? I don’t think so. Besides, it really hurt to have that thing stuck in there.”
Daniel nodded as his giggling began to subside. “Whatever you say, Jack.”
“It did!” protested Jack. “Anyway, thanks for getting it out.”
Daniel never had a chance to respond to Jack’s thanks, as the door to Sam’s lab suddenly burst open. Carter herself stuck her head inside and looked at the two men questioningly.
“What are you two doing in here?”
Daniel’s hand, still holding the pliers and candy cane, whipped behind his back on instinct and two male voices answered simultaneously.
“Nothing.”
Sam gave her teammates an appraising look, clearly not believing them.
Daniel spoke again quickly. “Um… just needed a break from the party for a minute.”
Sam still didn’t believe him, but seemed to decide that finding out exactly what the Colonel and Daniel were up to wasn’t worth the trouble.
“Whatever. I don’t care. General Hammond asked me to find you. So, get out of my lab and back to the party.”
Jack’s eyebrows rose at Sam’s tone. She noticed. “Um.. please… sir.”
With that, Sam turned and left, clearly flustered. Jack laughed to himself.
Daniel quickly dropped Jack’s nasty candy cane remnant in the trash and returned Sam’s pliers to her workbench after giving them a quick wipe on his pants leg.
Jack nodded to the archeologist. “Thanks. I owe you one. I’d never live that down if she knew about it.”
Daniel gave Jack a sidelong look and emitted a soft chuckle as the two men left the lab and shut the door behind them.
“Oh, I don’t think you’ll live it down now.”
Jack’s eyes widened briefly. “You wouldn’t.”
Daniel laughed. “No, I wouldn’t. But… you do owe me. And I will collect.”
Jack snorted back at his friend as Daniel rejoined the party. Daniel never heard Jack’s response, or saw the grin that accompanied it.
“Oh, of that I have no doubt. But, Daniel, my boy… payback’s a bitch.”
The End
